When People Become Precious (written Nov 30, 2014)

I remember writing a blog post with this exact sentiment when I left Thailand after a year to come home and get married. I may have even titled it the same. Today was one of those days. One of those days when being here, away from family and close friends, away from our favorite foods and yummy coffee drinks, one of those days when being here was easy. 

DJ

A gracious friend checked out a mission car in order to drive our family to the hometown of Anna, our house help. She was leaving for the weekend to go to the wedding of an extended family member. I asked her if I could come along. She was really surprised I was interested, but very excited. Her hometown is in the “bush,” which is the African way of saying the “boonies,” so it took a bit of planning to make it work. Anna went early and stayed late to help with preparations, so we drove her husband and "adopted"* son, DJ, with us. The groom was DJ's older brother.

Waiting for the wedding

We didn’t see much of the wedding, just the women dressed up in their best and some of the men drumming and dancing. But we saw probably every member of Anna’s extended family within a mile radius (a long distance when walking on sandy roads with flip flops!). And it was worth every step. Anna has become so dear to us. She feels like my Hausa Prang, for those of you who know of my dearest friend and sister in Thailand who was in our wedding. It was so special to be able to meet Anna's dad and sister and grandma and cousin… and cousin and cousin. It was so special to show her that the people who are important to her are important to us. And to have another shared experience that gives us even more of a connection.

We had to leave early so our friend, Deb, could drive us home before dark. Before we got in the car, Anna gave me a big hug. Not just an awkward “I-know-you-Americans-do-this” hug, but a strong one. In the car, Moriah can’t see Anna through all the people crowded around the vehicle so she hollers out “Where’s Anna? Where’s Anna?” Anna can see Moriah craning her neck and waving eagerly. As we pull away, Anna is visibly choked up. Hausa people do not choke up often. They say “You can cry in your heart, but not in your eyes.” Kids are chasing our car, and Anna keeps walking with them. Now her face has broken out into a huge smile with her teeth shining bright against her dark face. She is waving happily.

My heart is overwhelmed with all kinds of feelings - joy, sadness, privilege. Joy for being able to catch a glipmse of Anna’s childhood and see her family. Sadness for the impending goodbye that is coming in under two weeks. Privilege at being able to know such a special women and being able to call her our friend and sister.

I was describing our day to a fellow missionary and said, “These are the moments when you say ‘This is why we’re here.’” Then I said, “Actually a better way to describe our day is that these are the moments when being here is easy.” 

Leaving Starbucks and fast food and jeans and putting on head coverings and scarves and long skirts... we need to do these things if we want to have meaningful relationships with people here. And all these things are hard. When the people here become precious to us, however, that changes everything. All these things become easy when people become precious.

I thought about being in heaven one day, standing with Prang and Anna both. How did I get to be so fortunate that God would allow me to know such precious people? I’m sad that our lives are intersecting only for a season, but grateful that because of Jesus, our relationships can have significance for eternity. Relationships. They are the only investments that offer dividends when we leave this world**. Our relationship with God, and our relationships with the people He has given us to love.  If we invest wisely, and by the grace God gives us through His Spirit living in us, our dividends will be fellow worshippers with us in heaven, and more friends to walk with on that glorious day when God makes all things new. All things new. Jesus told us not to store up treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but to store up for ourselves treasure in heaven, where moth and rust cannot destroy and where thieves cannot break in and steal. My Starbucks gets cold and my Brahm’s shake gets warm, and our mutual funds can be wiped out in an instant. But my Anna? She will be singing and dancing forever at the feet of Jesus. And I will get to be there with her. Even if she has better rhythm than I do. 

*I use adopted in quotations because adoption within Hausa culture resembles our understanding of the concept, but also has differences. Hausa adoption usually seems to happen within an extended family. Also, the adopted child seems to maintain the biological identity. For example, DJ’s biological parents were introduced to us as his parents, and his biological brothers were introduced to us as his brothers.

**I fondly credit my dear friend and mentor from my time in Thailand, Jim Larson, for this line of thinking from Matthew 6:19-21.

All photography credit goes to Deb Berruti